Check out the lovely Laura’s blog where a guest post I’ve written about my relationship with my sisters is up today 🙂 I’ve also included the post below.
I’ve been meaning to write a post about my twin sisters for a while but never quite found the opportunity to dedicate the time to write it “properly”. I wanted it to be straight from the heart and very real – I haven’t felt in “the zone” enough to do it so far. Perhaps because I’m bursting with emotion when it comes to them and actually I struggle to articulate how I feel about them.
But, the lovely Laura asked for volunteers to write a post about their sisters as part of her one month blog project in dedication to her sister, Zoey that she sadly lost at the young age of 23. I saw this as my perfect opportunity to reflect on my relationship with my sisters – the thought of ever being without them devastates me and Laura’s story definitely tugged at my emotions and gave me the perfect reason to actually write this post.
I’m so lucky to be blessed with not one, but two sisters. It’s true that the best gift you could give a girl is a sister. I got extra lucky – thank you mummy and daddy!
There’s a six year age gap between Harvy, Goovy and myself so often I find myself mummying them. I never want them to get hurt and want to shield them always.
Although younger than me, they often surprise me with their wisdom. I’ve learnt a lot from them and continue to do so. I don’t know where I’d be without them. Life has thrown some tough situations my way and without them standing at either side of me, I don’t know where I’d be.
Just thinking about when I fractured my skull in 2009 following a car accident in India, I’m still unsure whether a C-section topped the pain I was in then! I ended up having to undergo two major surgeries. Without the twins and their larger than life bright personalities I don’t know how I would have physically, mentally and emotionally survived. They have always been and I hope they always will be my right hand women and I hope I’m the same for them.
Goov, although the youngest, is like a second mum to me. Post accident, she would help me shower, help me go to the bathroom and would give me a towel bath when needed when I was bed ridden. Harv helped me to master walking again – something I struggled with. She’d dedicate hours to helping me walk up and down the lounge or up and down the stairs. I’ll never forget those times because I was at my weakest physically. Although mentally I tried to stay positive, I had my moments of weakness and the twins were always there to pick me up and pump me with lots of positive energy.
They ensured they were at home by my side whenever possible and would keep me company whether it meant entertaining me with their lame jokes or watching trashy TV – just having them with me made all the difference. I’m sure it was harder for them than it was for me to watch their sister go through all that – I can’t bear the thought of either of them ever being in pain. I remember when Goov came with my dad and I to have the screw from my head removed post surgery – she cried with me. I felt guilty for inflicting that pain on others – especially them and my parents.
God may have put me in that situation but he also ensured I had guardian angels to get through – one of the toughest years of my life has given me some of my fondest memories with my sisters as it brought us even closer.
I’m so lucky that I don’t need to look further than my own siblings for friends (although God has blessed me with adopted sister friends too!) – I have my best friends in my sisters. We have our fair share of arguments (and pull each other’s hair out on occasion), but we also have more than our fair share of laughs. We have our own secret language that only we know, but we are also quick to use plain and simple (and sometimes unfiltered) language to let each other know when we’re peed off with one another! We have our own private jokes, but we also have our public banter which can be humorous to others. I’m extremely protective of the twins although we can fight like cat and dog, I wouldn’t let anyone breathe a bad word about them. We definitely have each other’s backs and come as a trio. Mess with one, and you’ve messed with all three!
My mum has four sisters and the relationship I have with the twins often reminds me of my mum’s relationship with her sisters. Although they have their moments, they couldn’t live without each other – they are as solid as a rock (Ashford & Simpson style!).
When it comes to Arjun? Where do I begin! I feel overwhelmed and well up just thinking about it because I can’t find the words to articulate how grateful I am nor do I know how to ever thank them.
I didn’t have the easiest nor the hardest pregnancy or labour but irrespective of this, the twins were by my side: My Birth Story. Once Arjun was born, the twins were absolutely incredible. They went over and beyond anything I could have ever imagined. They both arranged for time off at work so that they could be here by our side to help both Preetam and I. They didn’t even ask whether we wanted them, they were going to be there regardless.
Whether it was changing nappies, doing night shift, making lunch, helping me shower, doing the washing – the twins did it. I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve them. I really don’t. I can be such a cow to them sometimes but still they bounce back and forgive me so easily and me them. Goov was a God send during labour and immediately after Arjun was born. You can read more about her journey here: Guest Post: My Birth Story … Through the Eyes of a Birthing Partner. Harv in particular was a God send when it came to early days and night shifts. Sometimes Arjun would wake up 7/8 times and she’d be up before I’d even realised he was stirring. She emanates patience and has so much love for Arjun. Given he isn’t their responsibility, they take on so much and I’m so grateful for that. I don’t know how to thank them. I often find myself leaning on them for confidence.
They are like second mothers to Arjun and treat him no different to how they’d treat their own. He’s extremely lucky to have two masis (aunts). They’re so quick to jump up to help with nappy changes and vomit clear ups – all the things everyone else runs away from! Arjun absolutely adores them. He recognised them from a young age and his eyes light up the moment he hears their voices or sees their faces and is often in tears when they leave.
My sisters are my greatest strength, but also one of my greatest weaknesses (only second to Arjun). I love them so much it hurts. Thinking of them growing up makes me well up! I’ve always struggled with them growing up from when they wanted their first hand bag to the first time they wanted to try make up. I want to keep them young and innocent forever. I struggle at the thought of them getting married and moving away from home even though I’ve done just that. It’s a little selfish but I can’t help it. I hope our relationship never changes and only goes from strength to strength!
I pray to God daily to keep them safe and happy always, to keep them on the right path always and to shower them with blessings always.
I love you so much Harv and Goov, thank you for being you.
I’d like to say a very big thank you to Laura for allowing me to be a part of this project – I’m very honored.