Harps, Author at Baby Brain Memoirs

Posted on September 14, 2015September 15, 2015 by Harps — 21 Comments

A Trip to Westfield with Arjun … Then vs Now

The other day we returned back to Westfield for the first time since I took Arjun alone back in February – what a whirlwind of emotions it brought back. Being there, though not alone with him this time, brought back so many memories. I’ve come a long way but my fears then have been replaced by new ones!

I enjoyed being with him there this time a lot more as I watched him run around aimlessly – following the nearest person he could see and diverting at the speed of lightening when he saw another!

I was able to enjoy it so much because Preetam was with me. Had he not been I would’ve been pretty stressed managing things alone especially with my extra long shopping list (mainly for Arjun’s bits and bobs … Honest!).
Here are a few reflections on our trip compared to my last trip with Arjun and whether I’d be able to do it alone again:
1) We went to the food court again but I knew it was ok to do so as there were two of us to manage Arjun. Not sure how that would’ve worked had it been me alone. How would I have held the tray of food back to our table, managed a little toddler who is faster than the speed of lightning and manage our bags and buggy?! Ok the buggy could house the bags but that wouldn’t have really helped! I’d still have the food to deal with and a mobile toddler.

2) How on earth could I shop?! Even with reigns on, he’s trying to leg it! I was able to enjoy shopping as Preetam was with us and he managed Arjun. I’d still have the shopping bags issue had I been alone. How do you manage all the shopping bags as well as a toddler?! I can imagine I’d end up having a few ditzy moments!

3) Reflecting on my last experience alone, nappy changing seemed like a huge deal. It wouldn’t be now. He goes less frequently and it wouldn’t be such a huge deal compared to dealing with other things. My energy is more likely to be used up on chasing him, a nappy change would probably be a welcomed break now!

4) I’d definitely feel a little more confident in terms of not worrying about him having a crying episode there. He didn’t cry at all during this trip. He was really happy and excited seeing so many people, lots of new surroundings and being able to move himself. With his new found independence has come reduced tears which has instilled me with a little more confidence.

5) We can enjoy the same food which means I wouldn’t have to worry about pre packing food – I LOVE this! Arjun had a mini square pie (spinach sweet potato and goats cheese) mash and beans while we enjoyed the adult version. I really love that other than a few snacks, I don’t really need to pack much in terms of meals when out as I can easily pick something up.

I probably wouldn’t feel brave enough to go to Westfield alone with Arjun if I had a huge shopping list but I’d definitely feel comfortable going if I had a quick trip planned. One where I didn’t require a buggy or end up with a gazillion shopping bags!

I may set myself the challenge when I feel brave enough to take on Westfield alone again. Even if it is just for a quick trip. It’ll be interesting to say the least!

Do you have any tips for shopping with a toddler? x

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Posted on September 10, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — 20 Comments

14 Month Update … A Month Full of Quirky Antics and Hitting a Big Milestone!

A little late due to my Nana Ji’s passing, but better late than never! Here’s Arjun’s 14 month update. A month full of his quirky antics!

He’s hit his biggest milestone yet … He’s now walking! … Running even!

He has a new habit of grabbing any item of clothing and draping it around him or over his head.

He has his first happy meal … Naughty mummy

He loves painting but has regular tantrums when told he can’t eat paint

He loves to feed others and likes sharing his food in general

He likes to play with building blocks
He likes to eat with a fork but still hasn’t quite mastered using a spoon!

He gives cuddles on demand
He loves playing prison kissies with me through the baby gate

He got his first pair of proper shoes

We’ve had a rough week of teething as his molars are making an appearance
He likes to comb his own hair

Had his first nursery summer fete
He says “Dada”, “Mama”, “Ba Ba” (bye bye)
We had our first proper experience of life with a walking toddler at the Gurdwara!

He’s very sensitive to people leaving our house if they’ve come to visit – it’s usually pretty dramatic
He loves pushing things around and rearranging furniture

https://youtu.be/3gQt0LVQWjA

He had his first summer fete

He likes to blow raspberries on my tummy!
He hates the word “no” and has a tantrum any time it’s used!
His favourite food is definitely raisins
He likes popcorn

He weighs 12kg

Posted on September 6, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — 43 Comments

My Realisations After Losing My Papa Ji

It’s been a while since I’ve blogged. I’ve shut down a little since Papa Ji passed. I haven’t felt like talking. I’ve just wanted to be by my Biji, mum and Masis side so that’s what I’ve done. I ended up taking a little break from most things as I haven’t really had much to say as I can’t find the words to express my feelings and to be honest even writing the below post has been really difficult – I’m really struggling to find the words to articulate how I feel. Hopefully it makes sense x

It was really tough saying goodbye to our Papa Ji on Thursday. Watching my mum and her siblings lose a parent and watching my Biji lose her life partner was heartbreaking. There are no words to describe how much we will miss our loving grandfather. He’ll be remembered for how loving he was and for his signature laugh.

My most prominent memory of Papa Ji is him dropping and picking my cousins and I from school everyday all the way till we were done at secondary school. He’d come donning a leather jacket, jet black beard and a mobile phone blaring Sunrise Radio – everyone thought he was my dad as he always looked so young.

He was such a handsome and smart man and we were all so proud to have him as our granddad.

I’m eternally grateful to God for allowing Papa Ji to meet his great grandson and vice versa. Arjun is so blessed. Papa Ji was ecstatic when Arjun was born and we have some super cute memories of them both. He was always so overjoyed to see Arjun and became a big kid himself when they were together. He always said Arjun would be a strong boy and showered him with countless blessings.

I realised quite a lot over the last week since Papa Ji’s passing. Lessons and realisations which I hope will impact my daily life.

1) Our parents and grandparents are unfortunately not invincible. I always knew that this day would come but never really accepted it. I struggle to cope with the thought that one day I may be without my parents – to me they’ll be here forever. Losing Papa Ji has made that more of a reality. He is the first grandparent on my side that we’ve lost while my sisters and I have been old enough to understand what’s going on. Cherish every single moment you can with your loved ones. Especially parents. My mum and her siblings long to feel their father’s arms around them again.

2) Don’t wait until tomorrow … You may have seen that I’ve taken up an old hobby of sewing and have recently purchased a sewing machine. For Christmas I had planned to make Papa Ji pyjamas on my machine. I was super excited to make something so personal and with love as opposed to an off the shelf gift. I’m a complete novice but I knew he’d appreciate the sentiment and I thought I had time to practice.

Never had I imagined that the first and last thing I’d be making him was his cover to keep him warm as we put him to sleep forever.

Heartbreaking.

I felt honoured to have done it but with each stitch my heart broke. This isn’t what I’d planned. Don’t wait until tomorrow to do something special for a loved one. It may be too late.

3) Life’s simple pleasures … My Papa Ji and Biji have 6 children all of whom are married, 15 grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren – what an amazing legacy he’s left behind.

Losing Papa Ji has resulted in his children reminiscing about their childhood and sharing their stories. It’s fascinating to hear about how they lived, where they’ve come from (Kenya to India and then England), and the many characters they’ve encountered on their way.

Hearing about their simple pleasures like drinking water from the wells in Kenya and eating fresh fruits off the trees in India and giggling to sleep as the five sisters shared a bedroom when they moved to England made me realise how I often forget to enjoy the simplest thing. In comparison my life feels over complicated – I want to enjoy life’s simple pleasures so much more just like our parents and grandparents did before life became so complicated. Whether it be picking daisies in the garden with Arjun or building a forte out of chairs and blankets. I want him to also appreciate life’s simple pleasures.

It’s also good to hear about their struggles through life to appreciate how easy we have it now in comparison.

4) Five minutes to you could mean the world to someone else … I’d often drive past my grandparents house and think “let me pop in for five minutes” when I was rushing to some place or another. And then I’d think “actually no let me plan to come properly”. I figured spending quality time beat a quick five minute pop in. In hindsight I wish I’d done both. Five minutes of our time means the world to them. Biji and Papa Ji live alone and we often forget through the hustle and bustle of our own lives that actually theirs are quite quiet in comparison. Make time – even if it’s five minutes.

5) Kirtan, Paat and Simran are all food for my soul … I didn’t need Papa Ji to leave us to realise that. It’s only reinforced it. Without religion I don’t know how I’d cope in such situations. Nor do I know how my mum and her siblings would. I take some sort of comfort from what Gurbani (Sikh holy scripture) teaches us. Papa Ji brought his children up in such a beautiful way and in a way where they are all have a level of spiritual maturity which helped them to understand and accept the situation and also help us. Papa Ji would be so proud of how they’ve dealt with his loss – the way he would have taught them through Gurbani.

6) Arjun’s daddy … No words to describe how supportive Preetam has been and how blessed we are to have him as Arjun’s daddy. I stayed at my mums to be close to her and my Biji while Preetam kept Arjun over night and would bring him over during the day. His support and understanding made it so much easier to deal with the grief and to be there for my mum and Biji. I’m lucky to have a husband that dotes on his son so much. Arjun and Preetam’s bond is the most beautiful thing I’ve seen – they’re so lucky to have each other.

7) Let by gones be by gones … Life’s too short.

8) Quality not quantity … The words “I’m there for you if you need anything” are used so often but there’s very few people that are able to honour it – cherish those that do.

9) Family first … I’m blessed to have such a huge family. We may have our ups and downs, highs and lows but we’re solid when it matters most. My Masis and Mami Ji are an inspiration to the twins and I where it comes to pulling together. All six of them have such different personalities, but together it works – they draw off each other’s strength. Every one of them is hilarious in their own way too – definitely a trait they inherited from their father!

10) Grateful for technology as it means we can hear my Papa Ji’s voice over and over on the video recordings we have of him.

Papa Ji may no longer be here in his physical form but his memory lives on through each and every one of us.

Rest in peace Papa Ji, we love you x

Posted on August 20, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — 44 Comments

“Nothing Lasts Forever” … Cherish Every Moment

The most useful and home hitting advice I’ve ever received since I’ve had Arjun. It’s probably applicable to a lot of things in life. I often find myself worrying about the past or attempting to plan for the future and I often forget to live in the present.

… This very moment…

Now.

Sometimes I wish I could just stop, sit, close my eyes, breathe and become aware of my surroundings instead of being so scatter brained with the millions of things I have going on!

Nothing lasts forever …

Not the bad times nor the good times so cherish every single moment. The good, the bad and the ugly – for one day they’ll become distant memories.
I don’t mean it in a negative way, I mean it in a positive way. Enjoy each and every phase of your baby’s life – life’s simple pleasures.

1) Rock a bye baby: He won’t want to be rocked to sleep forever so embrace it – I had so much advice around rocking and not doing it. But why not? It makes my heart melt that my baby boy took so much comfort in my arms wrapped around him, the sound of my heartbeat against his dinky little ears beating to the rhythm of my gentle rocks. He doesn’t want that anymore. He doesn’t want to be cradled because nothing lasts forever. Now he puts himself to sleep at nap times 🙁

2) Sweet Dreamin’ with Mama & Papa: He may not always want to sleep in your bed. I love having Arjun snuggled up close in the comfort of being with mummy and daddy. Co sleeping won’t last forever either. Our issue with co sleeping is that none of us actually get much sleep! Do what works for you and remember that nothing lasts forever – we already cramp Arjun’s style on the days he does end up in our bed!

3) Let a Baby be a Baby. I used to have terrible OCD where the slightest bit of “dirt” would gross me out. I’m so happy and proud of myself for overcoming parts of that since having Arjun. Yes he makes a mess when he eats, yes my cream coloured carpet has now turned a shade of beige, yes it means I have to clean a little more but guess what?
Nothing lasts forever.

I’m lucky that Arjun likes to eat, so what if he makes a mess? He’s a baby. Soon it’ll pass. Soon he’ll be eating with a knife and fork and clearing up after himself and I’ll miss his mucky face and clearing up after him.

4) Teef: Yes the sleepless nights are tough with teething, yes you may feel like you’re at your wits end, yes the sound of your baby’s cry may make you want to break down out of sheer helplessness or just because you’re fed up and frustrated. That’s ok. You’re not alone.
But remember nothing lasts forever.

Like many things baby related, teething comes in waves. It’ll soon pass.

5) Peekaboo’ing: Sometimes Arjun wants to play at the most inconvenient times but I remember that nothing lasts forever. We laugh hard and play for as long as he wants. Soon he’ll be too grown up for it and it won’t humour him as much. Soon he’ll be a big boy.

6) Climbing Mountains: The stairs – this used to drive me absolutely mad till I stopped and reminded myself …

Nothing lasts forever.

To Arjun the stairs are like a giant mountain, it’s fun and exciting. I want him to grow up enjoying outdoorsy things (although I’m talking about the stairs inside!). So now, I help him climb. It’s a game and we enjoy it together. I love the sound of him squeal with excitement as he reaches the top. Instead of stopping him, I now show him and support him because even this won’t last forever.

7) Tele Addict …: Allowing your baby to watch TV is very much an issue of contention. The truth is I did let Arjun watch TV from a younger age than I probably should have (around 3 months) but it helped calm him and it gave me a little time out especially during my recovery. Thankfully the likes of Baby TV are actually educational (not that he understood anything back then!). I used to worry about being a bad mummy allowing him to watch TV. Guess what? He barely watches TV anymore. I miss the days where he’d be entertained for half hour while I’d do what I needed to (selfish I know). I wish I’d not spent so much time wallowing in guilt – I wish I’d remembered that nothing lasts forever.

8) Prison Kissies: Arjun loves playing a game where he sticks his face through the baby gate and wants me to come and give him a kiss from the other side (usually while I’m cooking or cleaning in the kitchen!). He then moves along the gate and wants me to come follow. This can go on for ages. Sometimes I’m in the middle of cooking something on the stove, or my hands are covered in food, or I’m just too tired but I stop because nothing lasts forever. My baby boy may not always want to so willingly kiss me as he gets older. These moments are my most precious. Stop whatever you’re doing when your baby wants to play, it may be the last time they want to play it before they move on to a new game.

9) Sleep Cycling: Because that’s exactly what it is. Your baby may sleep for weeks through the night but guess what? Nothing lasts forever. That pattern may be disrupted by teething, by sleep regression, by growing pains, by a nightmare. When you’re having a tough night, remember nothing lasts forever. Soon you’ll be back to a phase of good nights. But make the most of that too – as nothing lasts forever.

10) Drama Central: Arjun’s tantrums can be pretty dramatic (I wonder where he gets that from!). It can be frustrating and draining at times, but it can also be quite cute (bad mum I know!). But remember nothing lasts forever. Soon he’ll be able to communicate through words and he won’t react in the same way so make the most of their animated antics.

Cherish every moment …

Hug them a little tighter

Kiss them a little longer…

Because nothing lasts forever
x

Posted on August 12, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — 1 Comment

UDI Vegetarian Gluten Free Chocolate Chip Muffins, Bagels & Pizza Base Review

Hello all,

When I was contacted by Michelle at UDI’s to review some of their gluten free range, I wasn’t going to say no! Firstly, food is one of my biggest passions (in case you hadn’t noticed!) and secondly, I often opt for gluten free breads as I struggle to digest too much wheat without feeling awful afterwards.

I was super excited when I received my special delivery in the post which consisted of freshly baked gluten free chocolate chip bagels, freshly baked gluten free chocolate chip muffins and gluten free pizza base. When I opened the box, it smelt amazing!

You can purchase all these products from Tesco and all leading supermarket chains.

I’m always a little apprehensive about trying gluten free goods as I always assume they won’t taste as good as the real deal .. Here are my thoughts on the products I was sent.

Gluten Free Chocolate Chip Muffins

I love a bit of chocolate cake so was looking forward to trying these!

They looked delicious and fluffy in texture and as we split open the packet, they smelt divine!

They were surprisingly better tasting than a regular chocolate chip muffin. They were really moist although the texture wasn’t as fluffy as a regular muffin, it was a little more dense like with many gluten free products.

The double chocolate chips were a chocoholics dream as they made the cake taste even more rich and dreamy.

Overall, we really liked this product and would recommend it to those with a big sweet tooth!

Gluten Free Chocolate Chip Bagel

Arjun decided to join in with the review of these – the little monkey helped himself to a bagel before we knew it! He pretty much had one every other day till they were finished! He definitely loved them. Pre warning, the chocolate goes everywhere, so be armed with wipes if your little one likes to walk around with food in their hands whilst snacking!

These were dense in texture compared to a normal bagel and although they tasted different, they didn’t taste bad. I had my first one with a cuppa without toasting and it tasted similar to a fruit cake with chocolate chip – not too sweet, just right.
The second time, Preetam and I both had one which we toasted – I had mine with Nutella (obviously!) and he had his with peanut butter. They taste a lot nicer when toasted and topped. I didn’t feel lethargic and bloated after eating these like I do with regular bagels.

All in all, these were a hit in our home and we managed to get through two packets in 8 days between the three of us!
Gluten Free Pizza Base

As most of you will probably know, pizza is one of my most favourite foods so I was super excited to try this. I decided to save it for a rainy day when I was craving comfort food and that day was last Wednesday!

The process for this dough seemed pretty straight forward. Four easy steps! I could do this!

The instructions tell you to mix the dough using a mixer. I tried using a hand blender which was probably not the smartest idea I’ve come up with as it didn’t really work.
In the end I ended up using my hands. This seemed to work better as the heat from my hands helped mould and mix the dough.

The dough didn’t smell as appetising as regular pizza dough but I persevered anyway. It smelt a little like plasticine (it wasn’t an unpleasant smell).
As I followed the instructions, the dough didn’t come out as I’d have expected, I used a little more water to knead till it came out to a dough like consistency.

I tried to then roll out the dough on the work surface but failed as it began to break apart when I tried to transfer. I decided to roll out straight on to the pizza trays after lining with baking paper – this worked perfectly. I used my fingers to smooth out the sides.

I set the bases aside and placed a damp tissue over the top before keeping in a warm place for 40 minutes as per the instructions.

Once I’d put the toppings on (sundried tomato paste, red onion, pepper, sweet corn and mushroom topped with cheese and tomato) and placed in the oven I was a little apprehensive about how this was going to turn out to be honest!
As the pizza cooked, the house was filled with a delicious aroma. It smelt amazing!

I was so pleasantly surprised by how this turned out. It was one of the best pizzas I’ve made at home and although the texture of the dough felt dense, it was really light and easy to digest. It wasn’t soggy or moist, it cooked through really well.

If you like a crispy base, I’d recommend leaving the pizza in the oven for ten minutes once it’s cooked.

One box makes approximately 3 12″ pizzas. Preetam and I ended up eating a whole one to ourselves as it was so easy to digest!

This was definitely my favourite product out of the three I was asked to review and I would highly recommend it – especially for a bargain price of £3.00 (Tesco).

I’m so glad to have found a pizza base that doesn’t leave me feeling lethargic – I can now eat my favourite food without writing the whole evening off after!

I have teamed up with UDI to host a fab giveaway! Free food = win win!
Would you love to win this gluten free hamper full of delicious goodies?! It’s super quick and easy, you can find out more details here.
Disclosure: This product was received to review. All my opinions and beliefs about this product are honest and my own. This blog is solely written and edited by me. Harps x

Posted on August 11, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — 39 Comments

My First Month Back at Work Update

I can’t quite believe that I’ve had a year off, had a baby, celebrated his first birthday and I’m back at work already. I remember thinking (and stressing obsessively) about returning to work. To be honest I could just about manage work without a baby, and a baby without work … How I was going to do the two together seemed like mission impossible! I was super nervous about having a new boss as well as a new team. I’m often my own worst enemy where it comes to confidence. Some may coin the term “pessimist”, I call it being a realist (in an irrational kinda way).

As if I wasn’t fretting enough, on top of all of the above, our cleaner also decided to go on annual leave for a whole month.

PANIC.

Big time.

I’m just about managing with a cleaner. She comes twice a week and is an absolute God send. We have more bedrooms than we probably need (if you don’t count the vast amount of crap and clothes that I’ve collected over the years)! And we regularly entertain, so for me not having that help around the house seemed like a catastrophe! Yes I know in the grand scheme of things, I sound like a bit of a spoilt brat but it really did seem like this was going to go horribly wrong.

I considered getting a temporary cleaner – but what’s the point, by the time she got used to the house, Jeta would be back. I considered switching to paper plates so we’d save on washing – what a waste of money and it wouldn’t be very green of us! I considered lots of options …

But I quickly accepted that I was just going to have to cope. I didn’t really have a choice. I’d just have to get on with it! I kind of wanted to too. Surprisingly I was able to not let my mind dwell on it too much. I have a habit of getting myself in to a panicked state!

It’s been a month now. A month and two days. I’ve survived. I can’t actually believe it. I feel like some kind of superhero. I know millions of mums do it but I didn’t think I could. I’ve managed to take care of my baby, go to work, cook, clean, iron and entertain … all without Jeta … For a whole month! I feel like I’ve accomplished something major. And it’s been such an amazing month! Don’t get me wrong, I can’t wait for Jeta to get back and help but I’ve proven to myself I CAN DO this alone.

How have I managed?

Iron all our clothes on a Sunday evening for the next three days.
Clean the whole house on Wednesday evening after work so I can enjoy the next few days off with Arjun.
Meal prep something easy during the week to make my own life easier and to make the most of my time with Arjun.
Online shop routine: Thursday mornings and sometimes Sunday mornings.
Clean as I go along!
Pack our bags the night before.
Routine for the morning – I wake up at 5.45/6, Preetam wakes up at 6.30 and gets Arjun ready, we leave by 6.50. I’m at work by 7.30.
I do at least one washing load a day.
Top up the house clean on a Sunday.
Do all the ironing once a week – my least favourite task. I hope it counts as cardio at least!

Despite our initial struggles, Arjun has settled in well at nursery and is particularly close to two of his nursery nurses which gives me great comfort. I was so worried and consumed by guilt having to leave him in the care of others but actually I’ve seen such great benefits of doing so. I’ve seen him grow so quick this last month but by far it’s been my favortie month (13 month update).

He’s become a lot closer to me since nursery which is something I love – albeit for selfish reasons! The car journey from work to nursery feels like the longest journey ever (though it’s only 15 minutes). But the greeting I get when I reach there makes it worth it – he zooms towards me when he catches a glimpse of me through the glass panelled window on the door – it makes my heart burst with emotion … he waves good bye to his buddies with one hand while he has the other tightly wrapped around my neck beaming the biggest smile. He fights me to not get in his car seat after nursery as he just wants a few more minutes of cuddles while we watch the sky and the cloud sand the leaves rustling on the trees (which he finds hilarious!?).

Arjun’s nursery update:

He doesn’t cry when I pick him up anymore
Often see him pottering about when I go to collect him, either playing with a broom, or with the construction toys
He loves to play with bricks and the musical instruments
He loves to eat at nursery! To be honest, his food sounds better than mine!
He’s now walking
He’s smiling and laughing lots at nursery
He does the cutest things like lie his head down if he’s tired
He shares his toys (most of the time) but pre warning, his snack box is still a no go zone for others!

I love our Thursday morning snuggles – after three days of no morning snuggles, we make up for it on a Thursday! We have a new game, he’s turned peekaboo in to peekacuddle … it’s my favourite!

As nervous as I was about returning to work (a lot of my previous posts aired my feelings) is as much as I’m absolutely loving it. I actually can’t believe I’m typing these words out as I never thought this is how things would pan out. I’ve been pleasantly surprised and I’m so grateful.

Why I love being back at work?

My team are absolutely hilarious, the day passes by so quick with all the banter.
They’re super clever and I feel like I’ve learnt so much from them already.
I love being able to feel like I can accomplish something outside of being a mummy (as much as I love it) – excel was one of my favourites and it’s been good to be reunited (Arjun’s party planning spreadsheet couldn’t be pivoted or macro’d!) as geeky as that sounds!
I feel like being back at work has made me appreciate and value my time with Arjun so much more. I value my time at work, and I value my time at home. I want to make the most of every single minute. I feel like though we have less time together, it’s quality time.
I feel like I have a new found energy despite the early mornings. Im raring to go on my days off and in the evenings.
I have a new found confidence with Arjun – I have no idea why but I love it.
Arjun has become such a confident little boy at nursery – I’m so proud of him.
I love hearing about what Arjun has been up to at nursery.
I love being able to have adult chat and talk about things other than just babies – I hope that doesn’t make me a bad parent?
I love having a routine – I’m a structure kinda gal and find I work best with a little bit of a routine.

Some of the areas I find challenging since being back at work:

1. I’ve found it really difficult to manage family and friends in fewer days. I need to still learn to put my own family first and not be scared to delay things. Arjun’s not going to be this little forever and it’s important we also cherish family time with him too.

2. Early mornings – they can be a pain! But I’ve learnt that jumping out of bed as soon as my alarm goes off calls for a successful morning. The snooze button as tempting as it is is a no go for me.

3. Blogging – I often have a brain wave and string together sentences in my head (that sound bloody brilliant at the time) but I’m too tired to write them down and forget by the time I do get around to putting pen to paper. Maybe I need to invest in a dictaphone?! I love blogging, so I guess I make time for it. But it hasn’t been easy. I’m often doing bits and pieces once Arjun is asleep (like now!).

I’m eternally grateful for how my life has panned out – I was so anxious about returning to work but I’m so lucky to be enjoying it so much. The balance is perfect – and I’m eternally grateful to god that I’m able to work only part time as I know not everyone has that option. Its working so well for us. I’m generally in a lot better spirits and I feel like I have down days a lot less now.

I’ve had a few really down days which have coincided with me being back at work but not necessarily because I’m at work. I think its an element of separation anxiety which I’ve suffered with since my car accident – namely from my parents. I was having really sad thoughts about Arjun growing up without me. I’m not sure what the trigger was but I always struggle to divert myself away from those types of thoughts. Since I’ve had Arjun, my separation anxiety has been a lot better but when it hits, it hits hard. I bounced back within a few days with lots of love patience and reassurance from Preetam and lots of mummy cuddles from Arjun. Maybe it’s a reflection of my own insecurities as a mother!

“The most precious jewels you’ll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children”

All in all, my message to mummy’s worrying about going back to work – it WILL be ok. If you follow me on social media, you probably would have seen how stress/worried/anxious I was about returning to work. But I can honestly say it’s been the best decision for me to go back and like I said I’m eternally grateful that I’m able to go back part time. It’s worked out well for us and touch wood I hope it stays that way!

Now to go make my count down chart (on excel!!) for when Jeta is back … 😉

Posted on August 8, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — 32 Comments

I’m THAT mum at the Gurdwara …

… That has the “annoying” toddler that:

Comes and strokes your chunni (scarf used to cover your head) while you’re trying to listen to the kirtan because I want to see if it’s the same texture as my mums
Decides that poking the shiny mirrors on your suit would be fun – it’s sensory overload for me
Sits in the middle of the matha tekh (where you bow down to the Guru Granth Sahib) queue aisle as it has the best view – I did sit there quietly for a little while 🙂
Runs off to every child in sight – I like babies so much
Your babies want to play with because I always share my toys
Flashes a smile at you when your day may not have gone so great because I’m smiley and friendly
~~Dances~~ Moves to the beat of the kirtan (religious hymns)
Squeals with excitement and sings along to the kirtan
Plays tabla (indian drums) on my snack box
Likes to play peekaboo with my mummy and Masi (aunti)

So last night I decided to go to the Gurdwara (Sikh temple) to listen to kirtan. It’s been a while and I’ve been craving food for my soul! Bhai Niranjan Singh Ji was doing kirtan so I thought it would be a perfect opportunity to satisfy that craving.

My sister Goov, Arjun and I went together. I was armed with a few toys and snacks to keep him entertained.

I was so so nervous about taking him now that he’s walking. I was always one of those women that used to get distracted easily by children running around. My problem really for not being focused enough! I also had sympathy for the parents of those kids. I had no idea how difficult it was! My outlook and approach has somewhat changed after last night.

I honestly felt so out of my zone. I was so grateful to have Goov with me – it’s not something I would’ve done alone! My confidence isn’t great as you’ve probably been enlightened to. I kept questioning the situation, my mothering skills and whether my child was being a total nuisance:

Is he disturbing the peace?
Is he being disrespectful?!
Should I go pick him up?!
Is he annoying that lady?
Is she only smiling back at him to be polite?
Am I doing the right thing?!
Should I just leave?
Why don’t I just know what to do?!
Is he playing nice with those kids?
Are they playing nice with him?!
When do I go pick him up?!
If I keep chasing after him, will he think it’s a game?!
What’s the limit?!

Not sure if there’s a general mummy status quo in the Gurdwara (please share with me if so!) but after a little while I figured that Arjun was actually really enjoying being there. He was enjoying:

The open space
Seeing so many other children
The different surroundings
The kirtan hence why he was trying to play tabla/sing along

After about 15 minutes, I became a bit more relaxed. He wasn’t being disrespectful to Maharaj (Sri Guru Granth Sahib – our holy scriptures), he was just being a baby. He doesn’t know the difference between a place of worship and a playground. And when I looked around, all the other children were doing similar. I didn’t want to get angry at him and snap. It’d only upset him and that would’ve disturbed everyone’s peace and would’ve meant we’d have to leave.

I remembered something a friend once said to me – I figured, as long as he wasn’t disturbing anyone’s peace, annoying anyone or being disrespectful (in which case I’d firmly stop him!) I think I can handle Arjun seeing the Gurdwara as a fun and happy place. As his favourite play house – after all it’s his father’s house. I want him to feel comfortable and happy there. I want him to want to go there. He’s a baby, he’s entitled to be a baby in God’s house. I don’t want him to miss out on the upbringing I had – the Gurdwara, kirtan and paat has always been a huge part of me and has helped me through life. I want him to have that same comfort. To feel that he can turn to God – to associate God with positive things. Letting him be free meant he was happier than me trying to restrict him.

Yes in an ideal world I’d love for him to sit in one place for an hour but unfortunately he’s just not there yet! I managed to enjoy some of the kirtan and felt at peace with my child’s behaviour at the Gurdwara too. I’m definitely not alone. But don’t feel guilty – it’s their fathers house as much as it is anyone else’s. As Arjun grows and has more understanding, I’ll slowly teach him. He’s a super friendly baby and isn’t shy to spread the love.
I try and be as considerate as possible:

Sitting towards the back where before I’d sit towards the front
Coming armed with snacks
Having toys to keep him distracted for a little while
Remain calm to keep him calm

To those that don’t have children and so may not have all the tolerance and understanding in the world (like I was before Arjun!), I’m sorry if you find my child annoying but I promise I do my best to eliminate the disruption caused to your peace. Remember we need a little bit of food for my soul too and mummyhood is a full time job so I can’t and don’t want to always leave Arjun at home xx

Posted on August 6, 2015August 20, 2015 by Harps — 6 Comments

Vegetarian Healthy Sweet Potato, Bean and Carrot Fritters Recipe – BLW

Hello all!

Here’s my recipe for super healthy vegetarian sunshine fritters which I posted on Instagram a few weeks ago.

Arjun really enjoyed these and I hope your little ones do too! It’s super quick and easy to make. These vegetarian fritters are packed full of lots of goodness including good carbs, protein and vegetables.

Time taken: 10 minutes

Makes: 30

Ingredients:

350g Sweet potato and butternut squash (I use Tesco’s pre cubed sweet potato and butternut squash mix)
4 tablespoons mixed beans (I use Tesco’s four bean salad)
2 carrots shredded
60g cheddar cheese
Pinch of red chilli
Handful of coriander (or to taste)
Handful of cornflour

Method:

1. Cube and steam the sweet potato and butternut squash for 5 minutes. I know it’s lazy using pre cubed food, but in my defence it was a weekday and I had a long day at work! I cooked this as per the instructions by steaming for 5 minutes.

2. While the sweet potato and butternut squash is cooking, peel and grate two carrots.

3. Mash the four bean salad using the back of a fork or you can use a food blender.

4. Once cooked, add in the sweet potato and butternut squash and mash.

5. Mix in the cheese, carrots, red chilli and coriander.

6. The texture should feel dough like but still steady enough to be able to pat in to small fritters using your hands.

7. Coat in cornflour and shallow fry for a few minutes on each side until browned.
Voila!

Serving suggestion: salad, veggie sausage and sweet corn!

Plate can be purchased Here (available in three different colours).

For more information about our vegetarian weaning journey, click here.

Cheesy Greens Pasta Recipe

Disclaimer: as when trying any new foods with your baby that you may be unsure about, please check with your health visitor first.

Posted on August 4, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — Leave a comment

Arjun’s First Birthday Jungle Party … The Party Bags/Favours

Hello All!

Welcome to my final post in the “Arjun’s first jungle themed party” series – “The Party Bags/Favours”.

Indian tradition dictates that you generally give something sweet on a happy occasion to your guests. I decided to do something extra special and worked with Chas at Barfia to come up with something that would fit our theme. We decided on animal print barfi with exotic flavours such as mango and passion fruit. The barfi looked amazing and we received so many great messages on them. The boxes were personalised with ribbon that said “Thank you for celebrating my 1st birthday with me”. My personal favourite barfia flavour is definitely the black forest gateau!

I’ve always been excited to put together party bags for when I had a baby so now that it was my chance, the party bags had to be perfect (or close to!). I wanted most things included to be jungle themed.

I decided on animal shaped party boxes which I purchased from here.

Arjun and I did the party bags together – he was super helpful by grabbing all the toys he could and throwing them through the banister and on to the stairs! We had lots of fun together and I smile when I think about the build up to his party as we shared so many special moments through it. I’m glad we did as I generally have the tendency to get myself in a panic and a bit of a rut, but giving myself ample time meant we really enjoyed it together.

I ensured every party bag included an animal mug as a keepsake. I didn’t want to just include toys that would eventually get lost, I wanted to give all the children something they could use and keep for a while. I loved these mugs – you can purchase them from here.

Other bits I included were:

Squeaky toy for the smaller babies
Ella’s kitchen pouch for the smaller babies
Animal spring upsEdit for the older children

Elephant shaped chocolate

Tiger shaped chocolate

Jungle magic drawing slates

Animal finger puppets

Jungle stationery sets for the older children

Animal biff bats

Animal blowouts

I also included personalised stickers on each party bag with a thank you message signed from Arjun. I purchased these from here.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my party posts. I really appreciate all the kind message I’ve received in response! I’m so glad you liked what we did x

Want to read about the rest of Arjun’s first jungle themed birthday party? Check out the following posts in the series:

The Build Up
The Decor
The Outfits
The Cake
The Entertainment
The Food
The Party Bags

You can also check out my Pinterest board for more of my favourite party ideas!

Posted on August 2, 2015April 25, 2020 by Harps — 42 Comments

Arjun’s First Birthday Jungle Party … The Food!

I think it’s definitely safe to say there was no shortage of food! Most people left on their way in to a food coma! A happy and content belly is definitely a success in my book!

For the adults we had a catered BBQ by Masala Creations who we’ve worked with before – they are always so professional. I decided catered food would be best given the volume of guests. It also meant one less thing to worry about. Masala Creations took away all my worries and instilled me with the confidence that they’d take care of all on the food front. And they did. I dealt with Harpinder and Ruby who were really helpful. They did a site visit to walk through the day and were really great at reassuring me they were also there to support me as well as taking care of the food. That reassurance went a long way!

We’re vegetarian and don’t drink alcohol so don’t serve meat or alcohol at our functions. The adult menu was:

Starters:

Paneer shashlik
Pizza samosas
Vegetable spring rolls

Mains:

Vegetarian burgers in buns
Chilli paneer
Chips
Noodles
Corn on the cob
Sweet potato
Garlic bread
Salad
Potato salad
Coleslaw

Dessert:

Assortment of kulfi
Birthday cake (x3 flavours!)

We were really pleased with the service. We’d hired four waitresses to hold the fort on the food side and to ensure plates and things were picked up as they were used. I didn’t have to worry at all about the adults being fed – it was completely taken care of.

I decided to make the children’s food myself at home. I really wanted to present it beautifully and so focused my attention on that. The design and detail of the kids food was probably the part that I invested the most time in and I was so pleased with the end result! It was totally worth it!

I created homemade signs for each dish (again all vegetarian food) by creating fun names for the food. I then included animal pictures on each and backed each sign on to safari print card which I purchased here. I then folded over so that the signs were free standing. I love how colourful and vibrant they looked.

I had created homemade safari table curtains for three round tables which were displayed next to each other to display the food.

I purchased safari print wrapping paper which I used to wrap random boxes (thank you Amazon! Your giant boxes for the diddiest things came in handy!) to display the food on at varying heights. I ensured these were stuck down to the table and to each other with tape for health and safety reasons. This was probably my favourite bit – I’m so glad I’d thought of something to give the display height and even more colour!

I reused leaf shaped trays which were purchased for my baby shower. I love how effective they were at tying everything together and they kept with the theme and were the perfect size for the purpose.

I also purchased inflatable palm trees, a zebra, a lion, a monkey and a giraffe to use for display around the kids food to bring it all alive.

I purchased animal shaped plates for the younger babies and safari truck party trays for the older kids to eat their food from. I also purchased animal cups and straws and animal napkins for the children. There’s such a wide array of party supplies you can get, but this particular set was my favourite.

My friend Sav and I used to do fruit displays for weddings and parties years ago and we decided to do a dinky one for the children at the party. It was so much fun to do a (much) mini, less stressful display after so long! Our fruit display skills came in handy after years! Here are a few pictures from weddings and parties we’ve done previously..

For the mini fruit display, I carved a hippo head out of a watermelon which was filled with cantaloupe, papaya and watermelon balls, a crocodile out of pineapples and kiwis, papaya baskets filled with green and red grapes, and “palm trees” out of pineapples. My friend Sav also helped to create strawberry and pineapple and cheese “hedgehogs”.

In addition to the fruit, the children’s menu consisted of:

Chocolate Cheetah/Jammy Giraffe/Cheesy Snake Sandwiches: chocolate spread, strawberry jam and cheese sandwiches using assorted animal cookie cutters to shape the sandwiches in to safari animals.

Snake Spiral Pasta: tomato fusilli pasta.

Elephant Trunks: Bird’s eye veggie oven cooked fingers.
Cheetah Chicken Nuggets: Oven cooked Quorn nuggets.

Cheeky Cheetah Waffles: Oven cooked carrot and potato waffles purchased from Asda kids range.
Monkey Smiley Faces: Oven cooked McCain potato smiley faces.
Parrot Pizza: Oven cooked Tesco’s cheese and tomato mini pizzas.

Tiger Tails: Wotsits
Critter Crunch: Quavers
Zebra Chips: Tortilla chips

Roar Vegetables and Humous: Humous with sliced peppers displayed in the shape of a lions head.

Jungle Fruit Display: as detailed above 🙂
Lime Slime: mixed jelly

Hungry Hippo Hummous Dip
Big Bear Breadsticks
Cub Corner: For new eaters, I had Ella’s Kitchen pouches and Organix crisps

Watering Hole: Drinks included Capri Sun, Fruit Shoots and bottled water.

For our gluten free friends, I had arranged for separate food to be made which included paneer, chips, corn on the cob, and gluten free pizza.

I hired mini children’s tables and also purchased safari themed activity placemats for the children which you can read more about here.

In addition to the above, we also had a crepe and waffle stall, a slush puppy stand and a hot dog stand. The ice cream van we hired also went down a treat!